Living an Awake Life

Thoughts I'm pondering this morning from; "The Potential in the Pregnant Pause" by Courtney E. Martin onbeing.org

"One of my favorite mantras in the Buddhist tradition is, “May I see what I do. May I do it differently. May I make this a way of life.”

I say it often. Because, to be quite frank, I sometimes get really sick of myself. I get sick of my anxiety. I get sick of my automatic thoughts. I get sick of my “way.”

Of course I try to be gentle with my tired self; we all have a way of being in the world that makes us feel safe. Habits are part of what makes our lives livable. In the chaos of contemporary life, we crave the easily ordered, the familiar, the given. The things we do over and over again, the things that we don’t have to orchestrate or anticipate or invent, are like welcome exhales.

When we get too attached to these habits, we risk losing our sense of wonder and our potential for the catalytic experience. When we get too comfortable, we risk falling asleep on the job — the job being living an awake life.

So it has me thinking: what are the habits that I need to or, better yet, want to shed? What are the habits filled with pleasure, the ones that make me feel grounded and capable of diving back into the fray of my busy life; in contrast, what are the habits that dull me? What are the habits that have gotten me here but won’t get me there?

I also want to spend more meals doing nothing but, well, eating. Innovation isn’t the only thing murdered by habitual multi-tasking like this. Pleasure is too. Habit sometimes dulls the senses and strips us of the surprises that come with noticing. I want to actually taste what I’m eating more of the time. I want to marvel at how it arrived on my plate. I want to taste the gratitude.

My biggest ambitions to resist habituation are rooted in my relationships. I want to be less dutiful. I want to pause before I get busy anticipating everyone else’s needs and making sure that no one suffers or fights. My wiser self knows that both can lead to transformation. I want to take up more space in some relationships and less space in others. I want to spend less time on guilt and more on joy. I want to choose my choices. I want to depersonalize. I want to say it plain.

What about you?"

Being Authentic

"Ultimately, I’m learning to say no with more grace because I want to live with authentic generosity. When yes is overused it takes what should be a whole-hearted gift and turns it into an anxiety-producing check box. I don’t want to live a life measured by check boxes. I want to live a life measured by acts of unhurried love." Five Ways to Say No Gracefully

BY COURTNEY E. MARTIN

I am a person who needs a fair amount of alone time. I value quiet.  I don't want to rush. I don't want to think up things to fill every minute of the day. I don't have to be busy all the time. In fact, I don't want to! I want time to unfold naturally and with ease. I want to listen more to my body and my feelings and honor them. I want to take it slow. I was not always this way.

I spent many years running from one activity to the next. Packing it all in at break neck speed. This is what is valued in our society. We applaud the person who works the hardest, who puts in the most hours, who never says no, who has a packed schedule, whose calendar is full. We want to be that person. Very little value is placed on solitude, day dreaming, inactivity. We are pressured to perform or to at least have the appearance of being busy. God forbid there be downtime unless we are sick or grieving or recovering from injury. In the corporate world you are judged if you take all of your vacation days. You are admired, but not necessarily compensated, if you work past quitting time and come in early.

So, when I read this article by Courtney E. Martin I wanted to share it and talk about it because I think it speaks to all of us. Let's be more thoughtful of our own unique rhythms. Let's honor our inner voice. Let's create graceful days where we are true to ourselves and therefore more authentic with others. We don't have to justify or explain all of our decisions. It's okay to say no. It's also okay not to be constantly filling our days with work and activity. We must stop comparing ourselves to others. We are not better or less than. We just are who we are. And guess what? That's good enough!

LET THIS BE MY MANTRA:

LIVING LIFE WITH AUTHENTIC GENEROSITY AND ACTS OF UNHURRIED LOVE.

The Joys of Living in a Small Town

At the Wisconsin Wool Exchange, Tuesday night, mom and I gathered with a few other knitters for Open Knitting night. We had the time wrong and arrived an hour early so decided to go two doors down to Emmy J's coffee shop and have cappuccino ice cream and a hot mocha! We played BananaGrams while we enjoyed our sweet treat and waited for the shop to open.

In the knitting circle was our teacher, Maud, who plays beautiful music from Pandora and tells us stories. There is always interesting conversation and laughter...a lovely, relaxing way to spend an evening. And we always learn something; about knitting, of course, but also about life and local history, upcoming local events, music and so much more. Mostly I learn what it's like to live in a small town.

At the end of the table was Wendy, a local shepherdess. She worked on finishing a gorgeous sweater made from the wool of one of her very own sheep. Sitting next to me was Pat who was working on the most beautiful pair of socks I've seen in my life. I couldn't stand the thought of covering them with a pair of shoes. Maud says that is why she wears socks with sandals!!! As she was knitting away, Pat told us that she is in the process of starting a worm farm!! That was the beginning of a lively conversation about types of worms, containers used to keep them from escaping, etc. I had very little to contribute on the subject, but I sat, fascinated!

We also learned about The Wisconsin Sheep and Wool Festival coming up in September in Jefferson, Wisconsin. This sounds amazing and if you go to their website wisconsinsheepandwoolfestival.com you will see what I mean! There are vendors and all sorts of classes like spinning (don't think exercise class!), shepherds workshop, shearing demos, fleece shows and sales, photo contests, fiber arts, a Walk and Knit Relay Challenge, sheep shows, crafts,
4H competitions, auctions and so much more. I can't wait to attend this event in the fall.

By the way, we woke to a world of white yesterday. So much for my "Farewell to Winter" post recently. Although the birch trees and pines are covered in white it will warm to the 40's this afternoon and most of it will melt soon. Just to reassure me I saw, for the first time since we've been here, a male robin on the tree outside my window. His red breast was vibrant against the snow and he was picking at a red berry on the bare tree. I read in our Wisconsin Bird book that robins are residents here in the summer, although there are a few of them who do not migrate and live here all winter long, living on whatever insects and berries they can find. I'm pretty sure my visitor just arrived for spring. Later in the morning when I looked out the window again, the little tree was full of big fat red-breasted robins. I actually saw a flock of robins!!

I couldn't get a picture of the robins, but here's one of the creek we pass almost daily on our three mile walk.

Beaver Creek

Walking the Path of Love

How often do we feel afraid? For many people fear is a way of life. We  live in constant fear; fear of illness, fear of dying, fear of our loved ones dying, fear of strangers, fear of being hurt, fear of war, fear of not having enough money, fear of not making the right decision, fear of not being loved, fear of being judged, fear of not being good enough, fear of being alone... The list is endless. The 24/7 news media reminds us that we should be afraid. The government reminds us that we should be very afraid. We are surrounded by images and talk of fear.

I think fear has become such a part of living that we are no longer conscious of the ways that  fear affects us physically, mentally and emotionally. If we pay attention we notice that our breathing is shallow and often we even hold our breath, our muscles are tense and tight and we feel a sense of urgency. We must train ourselves to be aware of our thoughts and our body. We must become vigilant and if we find that we are in a place of fear, we need to stop and breathe slowly, deeply and refocus on love. We must cling to love.

"Fear is ultimately a poison that corrupts our own heart. And as the green sage Yoda told us:

"Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”

Yes, there is real fear in this world. Yes, fear is powerful. But we don’t have to walk the path of fear. We can choose love. The path of love is sweeter. The path of love is more luminous.

The path of love is not the absence of fear. Real love is made possible through vulnerability. Vulnerability is the possibility of having one’s heart open enough to let love in, and also let pain in. There is in this love the possibility of being genuinely hurt. The path of love is not the avoiding of suffering, but the welcoming of joy and suffering alike, the way a gracious host would.

So no, the path of love is not being impervious to fear. It is simply the stubborn refusal to let fear have the last word.

May we be awash in a love that begins in God, and encompasses all. May we walk the path of love."

- onbeing.org 

We Must Cling to Love

BY OMID SAFI

Flagstaff, AZ, summer 2014

Doggie Facilities!!

Bene and Luce have a new bathroom!
The dog kennel was fine while we had lots of snow and JK could shovel out the dirty snow and replace it with fresh snow to keep the kennel clean. When the snow melted, however we knew we'd have a problem, so he went online and researched how to build a doggie bathroom, bought the materials at Lowe's and completed his project in a weekend. Bene and Luce are very happy, as you can see!

Digging the trench.

The box that JK built.

Notice the shorts and patch of snow in background.

Lots of dirt shoveled into wheelbarrel.

Adding river rocks and fiberglass fabric.

More river rock then pea gravel finished the project.

Hey, Dad, we like the paved sundeck!

Mr. B using the new facilities!